Faithful Father

This is the second of two poems written recently through my experience of God's extreme kindness and radical faithfulness in times of confusion or pain. I find it so heartening that I wrote a post entitled " I love a God who has surpassed my expectations" last August in a season of great providence. Charlie and I had seen the hand of God so clearly at work in so many areas when I wrote that and it truly was my joy to experience the lavishness of the Father. This poem and the one posted previously whilst initially different looking, express and demonstrate the same characteristics of my wonderful Saviour. I love that during a time of easily being able to see God at work through His physical provision for us my response to Him is the same as when going through trials. Isn't He just so good? So utterly compassionate, overwhelmingly sovereign and comfortingly unchanging? The message of support, love, grace and acceptance in the midst of our suffering and through celebration is demonstrative of a God who is the same yesterday, today and forever and I am more thankful than I can say. Whatever circumstance you find yourself in today, be it happy or sad, celebratory or melancholy there is a God who seeks to draw near to you, who wants to do life by your side. He longs to support you and sustain you, to show you hope and peace for the future and to lift you up out of the mud of this life and set your feet upon a rock. He is incredible, wonderful and life changing. Let Him love you, it will be the best decision you've ever made....

Whilst in the womb You crafted out my frame,

Imagining and shaping You called me by name.

Watchful and tender You've held me from birth,

Through delight and through joy and pain at its worst.

I've wandered and wavered, years spent apart,

But still You've waited and lingered, calling to my heart.

I found You and loved You, freedom now my friend,

Astonished by Your care, life transformed 'til its end.

A sudden understanding becomes enlightening hope,

Lavish peace and favour what my soul has come to know.

Your faithfulness extends, my future now secure,

Certain of the unseen, full of hope for what is sure.

Whatever comes to pass my spirit now at rest,

I will say of the Lord "He's my rock and my fortress."

                                        Isaiah 30 19-21

     In the darkness I cry tears of bitter, salty pain,

Hope and dreams are lost, despair and sorrow, they remain.

In the night of my suffering a gracious voice calls,

I've been heard, I will be answered, I shall weepeth no more.

The bread that I chew, it doesn't taste right,

Every bite that I eat, it adds to my plight.

This water dehydrating and drying to my bones,

But my eyes shall see my teacher, no longer am I alone.

My ears perceive a word, whispered in the mist,

"This is the way, come and walk in it."

Thank you faithful Father for loving me so completely.

Sometimes I think we get confused about what worship looks like. We think we've ticked the box by standing up in church for twenty minutes and singing along but despite how excellent some songs and hymns may be, NOTHING is a substitute for a life spent devoted to the person of Jesus. Standing in church and mumbling along to the music is meaningless without this truth behind it.....
   

“To worship is to quicken the conscience by the holiness of God, to feed the mind with the truth of God, to purge the imagination by the beauty of God, to open the heart to the love of God, to devote the will to the purpose of God.”

William Temple.

Meditation on the cross.

The other night whilst at a night of prayer at our wonderful church I found myself transfixed by the cross in a way I have not been before. I found myself unable to look away. I was profoundly impacted as I considered again the work of Jesus. The significance of His death, the very real way that impacts my life today. I am truly mystified by the richness of grace. My simple words could never convey the depth of change acknowledging Jesus as your saviour has on your life, they are merely my reflections on countless revelations of my King.....

 I am struck once again by the cross of Christ,

Co-crucified with Him allows us too to rise.

Not through my striving or by any might,

But by grace overwhelming and power divine.

My sin is forgotten, it existeth no more,

Shackles now are broken, hearts set free from the law.

The old life deceased, a new thing now coming,

Help me to perceive it, make my soul ache with longing.

I so want to thrive in the promise of what has been brought,

Commit all my days leaning on what you have taught.

Taking up my cross leads not unto death,

But to life in all it's fullness 'til final breath.

For those still in darkness whose eyes are not open,

Wreck me and change me, make my heart broken.

I'm sorry oh my Father for treasure hid in a jar,

Set me ablaze on a hill, let light shine from afar.

Extraordinary love too high and wide to fathom,

Is mine all my days, I'm no longer held to ransom.

Cause me to be thankful, help me never to forget,

To be your faithful servant, my desire until the end.

What's in a second?

For the past 15 days I've been on annual leave and I've had a really wonderful, restful time filled with moments of laughter, peace and the Holy Spirit at work. Throughout this time of relaxation I've been pondering a few things and one area I keep coming back to is this; in the moment I choose to roll over and snooze my alarm for just a few minutes more, in the time it takes for me to enjoy a bite of toast or a drink of tea REAL things are happening in people's lives. Now I know this isn't news to anyone but I have found myself deeply challenged by thinking about this.

In a world where we find ourselves a maximum of 6 degrees of separation away from any other individual is it really enough for me to surround myself in me and the things I like? Is it ok to assume that because I'm happy all is right with everyone else? We find ourselves in a time where we are more connected with others than ever before and I guess where I'm going with this is; what if those links weren't just through a mutual friend on facebook or following a celebrity on twitter, what if the world really stepped up and embraced becoming each other's brothers and sisters in the way God intended?

At the time of writing this the world's current population stands at 7,094, 632, 702 and counting!! There are 4 births a SECOND around the world and almost two people die in the same time frame. These are staggering statistics yes but they are SO much more than that, these are defining, integral moments in people's lives. A healthy respiration rate for an adult is 12 breaths a minute, that's one breath every 5 seconds...So in the moment I have taken one breath 20 babies have been born! Isn't that incredible? I'm sure that most of those babies will bring people joy but we must consider too those children who are unwanted, and unloved, children that might come as a product of rape, children born into extreme poverty to a mother already struggling to feed her existing 8 children. These babies could become politicians, world leaders, drunks, artists, homeless, casualties of war, child soldiers, teachers, fireman, or secretaries. Any future we could fathom is potentially available. Isn't that crazy? 4 times a second unknown possibility is created but yet some of these children won't even live a day. Some will be born in pain, some will have a future already decided, bleakly laid out for the family to walk towards with growing solemnity. ALL of these children are connected to at least one other human so 4 times a second not only is new life awakened but hundreds of other lives are immediately impacted too; parents, grandparents, brothers and sisters, to name but a few.

Then we think of those in these seconds who are approaching the end of their lives. Will they die surrounded by those they love or in isolation? Is their death expected or untimely? So many unknowns wrapped up in an inevitable certainty that follows us all. I can't help but wonder at the lives they have lived, at the time they spent at work, in pleasure, at rest. What impacted these people? Did they know they were loved or did they spend their lives engulfed in tremendous loneliness. I will never know the answer to most of these people's stories but their truth, their legacy remains. The aforementioned are the two extremes at either end of the spectrum, we have to consider too the changes that impact us all throughout a "normal" day. We all experience elation and sadness, excitement and the mundane, our emotions are not a steady ship but one which is thrown about by the seasons around us. These details of the every day are important too. Lives are changed irrevocably by these moments that occur by the second. Tick tock tick tock tick tock. What am I going to do about it? Tick tock tick tock tick tock.

I cannot help but view all of this and then wonder at God....I know Him to be a magnificent, loving and generous Father, One who speaks intimately to me, whispering hope in the darkness and filling me with unbridled joy. He is One who knows the very hairs on my head in number, who perceives my thoughts from afar and has so many thoughts of His own about me that they outnumber the grains of sand. In view of my life alone this is staggering. This great Father of Holiness and lights, this tender master of intimacy knowing every detail of my existence and loving me the same. In that alone I am floored, staggered and moved beyond comprehension but when I consider that this same God who loves me so completely views EVERY, s i n g l e, one of those 7, 094,636, 403 (see it's gone up already) people the same I find myself in a state of absolute awe. Amazing love, how can it be that thou my God shouldst die for US ALL?

I know that I want to honour my Heavenly Father in all that I do and think, I want to represent Him well, to imitate him closely and to live my own life demonstrating this mad love for human hearts. If my Father cares about all seven billion of these souls ought I not do the same? Can I choose to disengage, to remove myself from others until compassion is a lost art? Is it ok to feel that I'm tired and I've earned the right to not consider another? No! How can it be so? In light of all the above we know with certainty that people everywhere, all the time are feeling intense joy and indescribable pain, lives are altered, shattered, begun and broken and I cannot, will not, and should not surround myself in a physical and metaphorical duvet and blot the world out. I must be moved to action, I want so desperately to be "standing in the gap" for those unable or unwilling.

I don't know how best to pursue these thoughts, to make them count, to fill them with meaning. It seems like an insurmountable task...I am reminded of wonderful wonderful Mother T and her wise words when asked how she feels about her work being but a drop in the ocean. Her response "Ah but the ocean is made up of many drops" is so obvious but yet profound. Even if the way that we choose to impact others has but the tiniest ripple effect better always to move than to remain stagnant. I know that my greatest weapon in loving the world is prayer. One can spend multiple hours in prayer but one can also utter snatched words in haste that have real heart and meaning behind them. So often we say we are too busy to pray, too busy to think of others and too busy to care. How often I wonder do we spend our spare moments checking our notifications on facebook, downloading a new ap, re-doing our lipstick, or moaning about our circumstances. So much can change in a single second. Why not take a few to pray for those new born babies and their families, or those on the cusp of death.

This is just a starting point, there is much much more we can do impact lives and society through social action and love but I guess my heart in this is to get us thinking about those around us, near and far, those we know and for people we are unaware of. I can say with certainty that my world is steady about me for now, I do in fact write this from the comfort of my bed but it is not enough for me to dwell on what I know and the happiness I find; as a child of God I must be moved into action for others. I want to discover new meaning and life to these hallowed commandments Jesus speaks of: "To love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind and to love your neighbour as yourself."